The Idealism of Finding a Husband in College


Idealism‘ defined is, “the practice of forming or pursing ideals, especially unrealistically

From a young age, girls are subconsciously told that college is the time to find a mate. If our relatives aren’t asking us about it, the media is constantly reminding us that now is the time. Whitley met Dewayne at Hillman, and there are a host of other movies and TV shows that showcase college relationships.

To be honest, I’d never paid it much attention until now, my senior year of college. Here I am, one foot inside the classroom and the other just about ready to walk across the stage when it hits me; “Who will I marry if I haven’t met him in college?” I know it sounds crazy, and I’m actually laughing as I write this but seriously! College is the time to find yourself, enjoy your experiences, and all of the other cliché things they tell you to do.

But after I’ve done all of those things, received my degree, and I’ve moved to a new city where I don’t know anyone, can I expect to meet Mr. Right at the grocery store when I’m struggling to carry my bags? Or will he come to my rescue when I’ve gotten a flat tire on the side of the road? All valuable questions that have (at some point in time) crossed our minds.

Here’s the silver lining in this cloud, college isn’t the place most married couples meet. Actually, only about 28% of married couples attended the same college. The other 72%? Maybe those are the people who met at the grocery store or when there was a flat tire. Who knows? I’d just like you to put all worries or concerns to the side when it comes to meeting your prince in college. If you’ve already met him, more power to you! But, if you haven’t don’t stress.

Queen, you have so much going for yourself. This time is the time for reinvention. Make mistakes but most importantly, learn from them. Build and grow your brand or image. Establish relationships with valuable people who genuinely want to see you become a better person. That is truly the essence of your time in college, use it to your full advantage.

From Me to You, Love. 


Shaakira White

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